Birds and Bees… Girls and Boys

We’re sitting down for dinner. Mom-ita made burritos and we’re all digging in. M-ito and I have finally cleaned off the dining room table so we can eat at it (it’s been months that it’s been covered with models and figures and games and the remains of summer homework). M-ito had his first day of 3rd grade today and he said it went well. He’s actually answering questions about what happened with extended narratives rather than the one word answers we’d hit bottom with back in May and June. We got around to the subject of girls.

I asked him, “How do you know if a girl likes a boy in your grade?”

M-ito replied, “If they chase you.”

Little Green Nubs

“Why do women shave their underarms down to little green nubs?” M-ito asks while we’re walking Spike-ito. When he asks the question he puts his thumb and index finger together and scrunches up his face.

“The simple answer is fashion. In other countries women don’t shave their armpits but here in the US most women do. But let’s see what Mom-ita says,” I reply.

“But why do they have little nubs green under there?”

“That’s probably from deodorant.”

“But why do they do that?”

“People use deodorant so they don’t have body odor.”

“but what if you smell anyway, even with deodorant?”

“Let’s see what Mom-ita says,” I counter.

Twenty minutes later we’re back in the apartment and M-ito asks Mom-ita the same question.

“Peer pressure,” she says.

“Like when all of your friends tell you to do something and you don’t really want to do it but you do it anyway?” I add in.

“Oh,” M-ito says.

There’s so much more to cover, like misogyny, male privilege, a discussion of who determines what is feminine, what is more woman-like, and what is beautiful (mostly men). But for now… fashion and peer pressure covers it all.