If We Didn’t Have to Sleep…

M-ito, after peeing, brushing his teeth and washing his hands (not necessarily in that order): “Dad-dito. If we didn’t have to sleep we wouldn’t need to have a bedroom.”

“But we need to sleep.”

“I know. I know. But, if we didn’t have to sleep we wouldn’t need any bedrooms. Then we could read books and snack all the time and never get tired.”

Paleontologist Tools

I’m in Dallas on a Business trip. Mom-ita tells me on the phone that earlier, while M-ito was ’supposed’ to be falling asleep, he sat up in bed and asked her, in all seriousness, “Mom-ita, when I grow up and am being a paleontologist, where will I get the things I need to be a paleontologist, like, I mean, shovels and things like that? You know, grown-up shovels…?”

Mom-ita said, “After I explained to him that he’d probably work for a school that could provide all that, he was not reassured, and kept asking where, oh where, would he get these things?”

“What did you say?” I ask, looking out of the hotel window’s 23rd floor view of downtown Dallas, feeling very alone and left out of things.

“I told him that we should ask Den-ito (Artina’s father), because he knows all about tools and things like that, and where to get them.”

Tools are not my thing so I let my chin fall to my chest and nod. “Did that work?” I ask.

“This calmed him down and he went to sleep,” she says.

“I’m glad.”

Later that night, when I couldn’t get to sleep because I was anxious about the trainings I would have to do in the morning for 100 drug court coordinators from all over the country, I got out of bed and threw my feet up against the wall in an inversion – took twenty deep breaths – a sleep trick from yoga practice. I thought it was funny, him not wanting to go to sleep, me not able to. In a strange way, it made me feel closer to him. And that’s a good thing, always.

Conversations You Would Never Have With a Girl Child

“M-ito,” Mom-ita says. “What are you doing?” M-ito is standing in his usual position in front of the toilet bowl, toilet seat up, ready to pee, only his pants and underwear are, uncharacteristically, up. He’s searching in his fly and through the flap of his underwear.

“I’m trying to peepee like Dad-dito does,” M-ito says.

I’m watching from the other room, waiting for them to finish so we can leave for a trip out to the Island.

Mom-ita shakes her head. “It’s not long enough for you to pee that way,” she says. “You have to wait until you’re older. Dad-dito has a grown up penis. You have a little boy penis. That’s why it’s not working.”

Finally like magic, pee emerges from the opening in M-ito’s pants. He looks at Mom-ita and smiles. Mom-ita rolls her eyes and looks back at me. “He’s your son.”

Yes, he is.

Interrogation

Monday:
“What did you do at school today?”

“Nothing.”

“What was your favorite thing you did today?”

“Rested after gym. I was all sweaty.”

Tuesday:
“What did you – “

“We learned sign language. This means I have to go to the bathroom.” M-ito has raised his first into the air with his thumb between his peace-fingers. “This means stand up. This means sit down. This means stop.” His fingers and hands have moved quickly from one position to another, stopping at each new meaning.

“Pretty cool,” I say.

“Uhuh.”

Wednesday:
“M-ito,” Mom-ita says, “show Dad-dito your chef hat.”

M-ito smiles and goes into his backpack, rumages through it for a moment then pulls out a flat white chefs hat. He opens it carefully and puts it on his head.

I can’t help but smile too. “Pretty cool.”

“Uhuh.”

First Day of K Blues

First day of Kindergarten. M-ito is one of thirteen children in his Kindergarten class. We spent six months agonizing over where to send him after having a difficult time in one of the public schools in our neighborhood with Pre-K. The DOE and its lack of communication, lack of respect for parents, and inability (in this school) to function effectively, put us over the edge. So he’s in a private school after spending summer camp there and familiarizing himself with the layout. But… as always there’s a but… it’s a private school so it costs to send him there. On the other hand there are only twelve other children with him in the class – two girls and eleven boys – and he has two teachers. He learned some sign language today and showed us the words for bathroom, stand, sit, jump up and down, and stop. He said he made four new friends. Mom-ita and I both cried when we left him there in the morning. We walked into town to have breakfast together and spent the day thinking about how our son is growing up. We brought him to Target to get a gift for him, a toy, to celebrate, this afternoon after we picked him up. He chose a small travel size etch-a-sketch. Gotta love that. Just, gotta love that.

Spike?

Okay. Spike is the name of one of the dinosaurs in the Land Before Time series. He’s a stegosaurous and though not very bright, he’s very lovable, and a good friend to his buddies.

Spike is also the name of the little chick, the Peep in her Pocket, in a Junie B. Jones book. That spike will one day be a rooster.

Sometimes you have to search for meaning in M-itoisms.

Spike

It’s the end of our vacation week and way past M-ito’s bed-time. M-ito whispers into Mom-ita’s ear while he’s getting into his PJs, “If we have another baby, can I name it?” He was playing with a friend’s baby girl today so it wasn’t unexpected.

Mom-ita looks at me, then back at M-ito. She smiles, “No honey. Not if it’s a girl. I have a name already.”

“What is it?” M-ito asks.

“Lillie. Isn’t that a pretty name. Like the flower. After my grandmother. You were named for Dad-ito’s grandpa, and the girl will be named after my grandmother.”

“But Mom-ita,” M-ito says. “If it’s a boy can I name him? I know a great name.”

“Maybe,” Mom-ita says. “What’s the name?”

“Spike,” says M-ito.

Mom-ita and I both laugh.

Places I love and Hate

The first time we went to the Hall of Science in Queens it was just incredible. Even though M-ito was too small to really get a lot out of it he was enthralled with the activity of the large space and the different things he could get his hands onto and experiment with. I found it interesting also, and fun. We played with sounds, shapes, looked at the giant fan run by the bicycle and made giant bubbles. It was also a great place to go in the cold weather. It was someplace to go and it was different than our apartment.

The second time we went to the Hall of Science in Queens we found the Pre-school play area and the puppet play station. M-ito loves animal puppets. He has a wonderful imagination and creates whole worlds with the puppets, the little tree stumps that are props, and the small stage they have for their use. I played with M-ito until my imagination wore out, and I needed toothpicks to keep my eyes open. M-ito could have gone on for another hour or longer.

The tenth time we went to the Hall of Science in Queens I tried to steer M-ito away from the puppet play station because looking at an hour or two of the animals, both prehistoric and modern, raised my anxiety to near panic level. We discovered the outdoor play area and I breathed a sigh of relief. There was the spider web, the water stations and the ball (giant marble) game. It was interesting to both M-ito and me to do together.

The twentieth time we went to the Hall of Science in Queens I sat in the puppet play station wondering if I’d ever get out with a shred of my sanity intact. I’ve found I can only exist at my son’s level for so long then the adult in me cries out for something different. I find it especially difficult to “play” with M-ito for a long period of time, say over an hour. Marathon play sessions of two to three hours just about break me. Mom-ita says I shouldn’t do that with him because it’s just too long. She goes about 30-45 miinutes at a shot – much more reasonable and healthy. Me, I’m a sucker for M-ito’s big round face, brown eyes and those infamous words, “Play with me?”

We’ve been going to the Hall of Science now for over three years and it is truly a wonderful place to visit. But now I dread to go alone with my son. M-ito and all children love repetition. They learn by it and it comforts them. As adults it’s a whole ‘nother story. Now, when M-ito asks if we can go to the Hall of Science, I try to find another parent/child combo to go with us. It just makes it easier – that, and he seems to have forgotten about the puppet play station there. I’m not reminding him.